Written By: Anuva Mundta
Edited By: Claire Xin
dear younger me,
you felt ashamed
of the culture,
of the traditions,
the beauty of it,
you felt ashamed of your heritage ,
your identity,
who you are
and there’s no blame on you
but them instead
when you brought your food to school
they looked disgusted
they complained about the smell
and you felt shame
when you went to school after a wedding
and showed everyone your mendhi with pride
they laughed instead
they asked why there was brown marker scribbles on your hands
they complained about the slight aroma it gave off
so you went in the bathroom to wash off the aroma while tearing up
and you felt shame
when you showed pictures of your trip to your cousin’s wedding in India
they made fun of you
they asked why the bride had yellow paste on her
asked why there was a droopy crown on your head
they giggled about the outfits you wore
they snorted at the traditions you told them about
and when you came home that day and you cried your heart out
all you could feel was shame
to my younger self,
they shunned a part of you
they hid your identity, and made you feel ashamed for being yourself
but now they wear the same brown marker on their face
they wear the same droopy crown for the trend
now they wear your clothes on the runway, calling it a two piece gown
they eat the same food for the posts
they took pieces of you for their benefit
and it took me years to understand
that they will never be satisfied with you in your entirety
for they don’t understand the culture
they don’t understand the beauty of it
they don’t understand the traditions
and how i wish they took the shame instead
Comentarios